Watermark (II)

Watermark (II)

I dreamed about him again
I wanted him back again
Sometimes it’s like my husband is gone
Not that I can’t survive
Just that I can’t live
Every breath makes me stronger
Every second pulls him away
It was always this way
A feeling one moment, another the next
But it was worth it
I know that now

I can’t sit on my heels
It reminds me of the night we met
Would I take it again?
Days of confusion? Uncertain and unsure.
I’d do it again
I’d feel you in the gray of the morning
Time by my side, behind
James sang to us and we laughed
But I cried
And I laid on top of you
Your body is warm
Your lips are soft
All the places I could touch
All the places I loved

And now he walks
Along the field that I planted
Pulling up my nectarines
Cutting down my trees
He has my lips
He has my places
Places I could touch
Innocent, perfect, sweet you
And he’ll never know you the way I do
And he’ll never see the sunsine splash across the pools of your eyes the way I do
And he’ll never hold you from behind and contour to you exactly the way I do
And you won’t kiss him exactly the way you kissed me
And he won’t know what to expect when you’re talking
He won’t remember sitting in the bath with you
He doesn’t know
He doesn’t feel you
Not the way I do
He doesn’t miss you
He isn’t bereft
We will never be the same person
You may find new love
But I am forever
And you are forever
Etched into my skin
A watermark upon my heart
Yours
Bruised

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